When Lins was in the hospital, we absolutely resisted/ avoided/ shunned other cancer parents. It may sound strange. But becoming part of the "cancer club" was absolutely terrifying. You may as well sign the resignation. Admit defeat.
Fast-forward 6 months. Not a single day passes without the thought, "Is she pale?", "Is the cancer back?" When you mention this worry to friends, other parents even, they look a little surprised. Really? they ask. I try to keep quiet. Not acknowledge the anxiety. Or at least not pass it on to others.
So, something had to be done. Daily worry, fear, dread, anticipation. That's no good. I started looking at other kid's cancer pages (Caring Bridge sites). Something I swore I'd never do. I didn't want to get sucked into that world. And then another mom posted a fundraiser. St. Baldrick's. Get it? Bald-rick's.
I started nagging Matt. You should shave your head. Really. Lindsay would love it. And I nagged some more. I was practically begging him to join the cancer club. Finally I gave up. And that very day I came home and he had raised about $600.
We've been hitting up everyone we know for donations and on Sept 12, he's going bald. It will be almost a year to the day that Lindsay's hair fell out. Of course we can turn any day into an anniversary right now. This fundraising has jerked us out of our self pity and worry. Every hour on the hour we check our totals. We're like kids at Christmas, waiting for Santa to come. Hopefully he's bringing cash. It's going to a great cause!